sometimes I just don’t know what to say

I keep meaning to come in here and post more often. Sometimes I have plenty to say and then time runs away with me, and when I get round to it, what I was going to say doesn’t seem quite so important any more.

These past few weeks I’ve felt like I have nothing much to say at all. Life goes on, of course. I’m working, which there isn’t much to say about in this space. I’m running, but I’m not sure I want this little blog filled with training plans and nutrition strategies. The garden is quiet and full of sticks. I’ve done little bits of sewing, but nothing much to show you.

I wonder whether that’s the problem? I like to use photographs in my posts, and I’m not taking many right now. Partly because the light doesn’t capture my imagination like it does in the summer, and partly because I’m not doing much worth photographing.

But was that ever the point? I often find myself thinking about why I’ve spent the last five years (really??) writing about my life. It started as a record of what was happening in the garden, and grew into snippets of everyday life, giving me something cheerful to remember when I felt I’d done nothing at all.

Sometimes I fret about silly things, like spacing my posts evenly throughout the week. But life doesn’t work like that – sometimes I work late, sometimes I have no photographs to post, and sometimes I throw my hands in the air and declare an internet free day. Sometimes that means I don’t post at all for two weeks.

One thing I do is strive to write the kind of blog I like to read. I like to see cheery things that people have been doing, see a glimpse into their lives.

Today is 100 days until my birthday. It’s not something I normally celebrate, but since I’ve noticed I’d like to do something to mark the occasion. I’ve thought about this for days, and asked friends for advice, and received many wonderful suggestions.

But I think the one I’m going to go with is a vague, unstructured one of my own. I’m going to post more. That’s it. No targets, no ‘100 posts in 100 days’ (I’m not that impressive). I just promise not to hold back when I do have something to say, not to wait for the perfect photograph, or the right time of day.

There might be posts with no photos at all, or posts from my phone with poor fomatting and dim pictures (I’ll try to keep those to a minimum).

I might post links to cheerful things I’ve seen elsewhere – something I mean to do and often don’t get round to.

I might post more than once in a day, and my posts might be a jumbled up patchwork of things rather than a coherent whole.

I will engage more with this place and you lovely people who visit. I do pop to your blogs, but I often just sneak my head around the door and don’t comment. I’m so sorry. I’d like to sit round your tables too, to learn more about your lives, and what it is that draws you here, what interests we share.

Right now I’m making marmalade and mozzarella, and eating home made rice pudding, and being impressed with my new slow cooker. I’m thinking about running, and a bath, and how the days are ever-so-slightly lengthening. I was going to save each of those things for a post of their own, and I might still write those posts, but it seems right to tell you what I’m thinking about right now.

So if you lurk, like I lurk elsewhere, stick your head up and say a quick hello, and I’ll do the same where you are. If you like, tell me what you’ve done today, and we can see how our Saturdays all look different and the same.